Raising Aspergers

- October 28, 2020

Parenting is quite the challenge isn't it? I think that every single parent out there has struggled when raising their children… and this is ok. Bottom line, raising children is difficult, really difficult, and it can get even worse when we don't understand what our child is going through or just don’t understand why they are different from others. Well hold the phone, for I, Ethan Stranger, will provide help for parents who struggle in taking care of their beloved Child (or Children) with Aspergers, who sometimes, don't even understand themselves. Let’s get started…

As I mentioned in my previous post, “The Aspergers Academy”, I didn’t learn that I had Aspergers until later on in my life. So, for more than 18 years I thought that something had to be wrong with me, there had to be a reason why I was somewhat different to others, right?

So, when I got my answer and found out I had Aspergers I couldn’t help but feel overwhelmed by shame, and uncertainty, like I was some sort of a strange monster. This happened because I didn't really know what having “Aspergers” really was for originally, I thought I either had a learning Disability (that would go away in time) or that I was a full-on austistic child - both would explain why I had such a hard time at school. However as time went by I started learning that, in truth, having Aspergers isn't something that's wrong, it's not a disease, it's not scary (once you understand it), what made it all so difficult was not knowing I had it in the first place.

I now know that I wasn't alone in this situation, my parents were also feeling the same confusion and tension and were facing the same questions as I was. I thought that my own parents had no idea what I was going through, even so, they still tried to treat me like I was as normal as everybody else and I really appreciated (and currently appreciate) that.

I now know that it wasn't as easy for my parents as I used to think and I want to try to help other parents might be in the same situation, so allow me to now give out some “tips from a former child with Aspergers” (now a man with Aspergers) to parents who are struggling in dealing with their child (or Children), they are:

Don’t be so hard on your Asperger Child (for your actions can affect the child in the future, like how Joseph Sugarman’s actions affected Beatrice (as a child), which led to her abusing Bojack in the future), because, as every other children out there, he or she goes at their own pace in life, allow them to make the decisions and help them if they are wrong.

Always give the benefit of the doubt to your Asperger child (or children) whenever he or she gets into trouble - understand that when they are young there will be many situations (especially social) which they won't understand and that sometimes, their words or actions can get them into trouble with someone else. If this happens, help them understand what social cues or rules they broke without knowing them so that they won't do it again.

If you’re going to force an activity or therapy on your Asperger child please explain to them the reason why you’re doing it and how it will help them in the future. Doing things without knowing why, especially if you don't like them can generate negative emotions and rejection on your children.

Be understanding with your Asperger Child (or Children), because they probably won't get it from someone else. They have the same emotions as everyone and just want to succeed in life. With the right kind of help we can achieve our objectives, one step at a time.

Always ensure that your Asperger Child knows the dangers of the world and what to do when something wrong is happening. Communication is key (and very difficult to create).

Always show plenty of love & care to your Asperger Child (even if he or she is angry), for you know deep down, they still love you (and they always will, even if they dont show it at the time).

Every Asperger’s child or children should know that their parents love them (like how Butterscotch Horseman (in the form of Secretariat) admitted that he did care for Bojack & Beatrice, he was just too afraid to admit & hid all that love with his anger & abuse). In the end, I’d like to encourage all parents that deal with Aspergers Children (or simply a Child) to be more encouraging.

I believe it’s time for a Change in the World of an Asperger Child, cause I believe that parents should have a better understanding in dealing with their Children (or Child) with Aspergers, instead of always guessing in what they believe is right for in the long run, they’re wrong & we’re the ones taking the fall. We prefer to go at our own pace & deserve respect and understanding within the society we’re forced to live in until change happens (in a positive way), but until that happens, I, Ethan Stranger am signing out.