2020: The Good, The Bad & The Ugly

I think that, like many others, my expectations for 2020 were shattered completely by the hard reality we had to face. As a person with Aspersers, this was very difficult to digest and adapt to, but, starting 2021, I can safely say I was able to overcome these difficulties. So allow me, Ethan Stranger, to share with y’all how 2020, a year that was supposed to be a fresh start for many of us, ultimately didn't go as planned (not just on me, but on the entire world), forcing us to change every single one of our plans to adjust to our new reality and showing us that we’re stronger than what we might believe.

When 2020 was coming around the corner, in my mind, I was quite shocked to see how incredible it was that I made it this far in life (especially after having to restructure all of my expectations when I left the US and moved to Peru) and I was hoping that 2020 could be the launching point for various great opportunities & changes (especially for somebody with Aspersers). I had great expectations regarding three main aspects that I thought were somewhat lacking in my life: work, education and social interactions. At that time I had just finished a short job opportunity I had while in Lima, and I really enjoyed my time there and, most of all, finally felt productive on a day to day basis. I wanted to find a new job, internship or volunteering opportunity but it was very hard to get access to any of them because I wasn’t fluent in Spanish. I was attempting to find a volunteer job at an animal shelter, but no matter how many emails I sent to them, I got no reply from there. As for education, after my time at a college in the US, I was very confused about what I wanted to study or do later on in life, one of my expectations was to clear this situation up and start to work towards my future goals. As for Social interactions, I really didn’t make a lot of friends during my time in Lima, I did attempted to be friends with these twin sisters during an art school I was attending, but we didn’t have many points in common, then I attempted to be friends with this one guy, however since he worked in the day, we couldn’t hang out until the night and he was very nocturnal than me. So in the end, I hardly made any new friends, got neither a new job or volunteer work, but I did manage to study Spanish at ICPNA, I attend in February & my parents enrolled me for the March semester, but it was cut short following the COVID pandemic eventually finding its way to Lima, Peru. 

My time in Lima would take a turn for the worse, once the news began spreading that COVID was spreading across the world like wildfire, causing a massive shutdown worldwide, stranding me & my parents in Lima, limiting all of my opportunities. For too long it was just difficult to do anything with the pandemic, however, My mom attempted to get us out more, but I refused (cause I didn’t want to catch COVID), but at the same time, we had to get shopping done & be prepared for our departure (even if it wasn’t totally confirmed). I can still remember all of the uncertainty and negative news that were flying around at that time made me particularly anxious and angry as I felt like a prisoner within my own house & I was walking around in circles (just like this song): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S0-coASIjkQ&ab_channel=crunkpunch

Everything was happening so fast that I really didn’t know what to expect & how things were really gonna play out, even if I had a good idea, me & my parents knew that it might change depending on what was currently happening in the world. Over time, I ended up suffered from  a sinus infection which made me feel even more nervous (it really didn’t help me during the pandemic), also I became stressed, unhappy, tired, all I wanted to do was find peace (even during a pandemic), but it’s very hard to. I’m pretty sure any Asperger person, or any person at all, would’ve gone through the same feelings as I did, however their way of handling the situation would’ve been completely different from mine.

At this point in time I started wondering about what things I could start doing in order to take control of my life so, with a little help, I used certain strategies that were very useful in the end:

1. First of all I learned that doing regular exercise (or workout) can be really helpful in managing stress and anxiety (although I’m having a little bit of difficulty in maintaining this one). 

2. On the other side of things, I learned that we can all have negative thoughts and ideas and the best way of controlling them is by contrasting (comparing) them with reality (for this shows that the idea itself was false and makes you feel better afterwards). 

3. Also, seeing as I wasn't able to interact with other people physically I decided to (finally) start a blog and try to communicate my thoughts and feelings with others - something I was against for a while cause I feared it would have backfired, but in the end, I decided to give it a shot & what do you know, my blog became popular (in its own right). 

4. I also attempted to go back on several of my story ideas that I’ve done & attempt to make several edits (even if it meant redoing them), which isn’t easy. 

5. Additionally, I tried to reconnect to certain family members and friends via email and… it mostly worked! 

The pandemic also gave  me the opportunity to finish up watching several shows on Netflix & began watching some new material. Lastly, the pandemic was a chance to make me & my parents closer as a family which is something I value a lot. 

As I mentioned in my Coronastrophy! Post 2020 will be remembered as a “considerable setback” & while we’re off to a shaky start in 2021, I know that this year in particular will also bring more opportunities to the table, it will be rough, but we can make it!

I’ve got many goals set for 2021, they are: 

• Attempt to live more independently.

• Strengthen my current blog account.

• Find a part time or full time job.

• Enroll in an educational program or course.

Be sure to share your own strategies and goals. Until then, Ethan Stranger signing off.